Day 5: A Drug Dealer Wouldn't Be Caught Dead In That Kitchen

While watching an episode of Breaking Bad, I realized the kitchen in the meth head's house was cleaner than mine. When the episode ended, I immediately got up and did the dishes.

It was two in the morning. 

Day 4: Suck My Hash Mark

I can't be the only one annoyed by ESPN pundits reading tweets from athletes out loud during Sportscenter. It's even better when the unfortunate anchor forced to read the tweet doesn't know Twitter lingo.

"We R so rdy to bust some Denver butt Fri nite,  #blowout."

Really? Did that need to be said? Do we now know more about the inner-workings of LeBron James' psyche via iPhone? The only thing I'm thinking after I hear that is I won't be following LeBron James on Twitter.

Stop trying to be "edgy." Just give us those same horrible, canned sound bytes that athletes have been rattling off for the past hundred years. We love those.

Day 3: Digital Dust

There's something wonderfully Zen about dusting off music that's been sitting in the collection for years without being played (I just realized that because my entire music collection is on the hard drive of my computer, I'll never be able to literally dust off old music anymore--fuck you, technology).

I'm a sucker for radio-friendly rock, and while I've "evolved" a bit into more arsty, goatee-friendly fare, listening to Breaking Benjamin, Third Eye Blind, or The Exies really gets my blood flowing (in a good way--not like the way it does when I watch Hayden Christensen movies...).

Day 2: David Carr's Spicy Peanut Sauce

Alright, so David Carr of the NY Giants had nothing to do with the actual recipe for this sauce. He just happened to be on TV while I was making it, and he was playing really, really shitty. I like to think that me yelling "Dammit, David!" when he threw a terrible pick against the Patriots somehow made my peanut sauce even spicier.

Here's the recipe:
2 tablespoons crunchy peanut butter
3 tablespoons milk
1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
1 teaspoon soy sauce
1 tablespoon Sriracha sauce
Pinch of chili flakes (for extra street cred)

Mix all ingredients together in a small microwave-safe-dish-type-thing. Nuke it for 20 seconds. Slap the sauce on a white fish like Mahi-Mahi, or use as a dip for fried tofu.

In David Carr's defense, he was playing against the Pat's starting D...although that doesn't explain the fumbled snap.